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Vindication!!!

June 4th, 2008 | By: j | 14 Comments »

Yes vindication as now the entire world (or whoever checks FIFA’s rankings when they come out at the start of the month) knows that we, beautiful Österreich, birthplace of luminaries in the arts such as Joseph Haydn, Franz Kafka, Gustav Klimt, Gustav Mahler, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Franz Schubert and Johann Strauss are no longer the 101st ranked team for now meine freunde, we are now 92nd!

Therefore it is official; we are the fastest moving team per rankings in the Euros. There is no denying.

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Comments

By "S" | June 4th, 2008 at 8:03 am

Only a few more months then and Austria will have leap frogged over England in the rankings.

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 8:11 am

and we know England will dare not play us again!

Besides how did England leap above Portugal?

By Jan | June 4th, 2008 at 8:30 am

You might overtake us, dear neighbours .

Anyways, let’s keep our fingers crossed for a Switzerland-Austria final where we, the Swiss, will obviously win

How’s the excitement in Austria?

In Switzerland people can’t wait another three days

Posted from Italy

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 8:43 am

ahh..how true the days of the Swiss – Austria super powers in Footy are near. No longer will we be just known for domination on the slopes! I imagine all of South America is dreading the thought of playing us.

We obviously need to begin to make plans for the finals. I’m thinking more of secret alliance where after endless penalty kicks the Euros is jointly awarded. We should likely be secretive of this of course.

By Jan | June 4th, 2008 at 8:51 am

How about just secretly drugging Cristiano Ronaldo, Toni, Klose and all those folks, just like during the final Brazil – France in 98?

I wouldn’t use banks and bribing – boring, used it too many times

(Actually we might end up playing a consolation game to see if we can score one small goal against each other at least )

Posted from Italy

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 9:05 am

maybe we could all jettison off to a neutral site such as Courchevel for a little futsol and we could laugh of how all of Europe didn’t know our secret plan. It would be grand, maybe a picnic too!

By june16_1904 | June 4th, 2008 at 10:39 am

Um, I think you had better put Kafka back in the Czech Republic where he belongs, as he was born and raised in Prague. Just because you had an imperial relationship with Bohemia, the modern day Czech republic, doesn’t mean that modern Austria can lay claim to Prague’s history.

Mahler was born in the Czech Republic too, but you can keep him as he at least went to school in Vienna.

Stop talent poaching!

By june16_1904 | June 4th, 2008 at 10:42 am

But congrats on being number 92 with a bullet!

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 11:00 am

Well, I hate to open up those “little” problems with the Habsburg Austrian Empire revolutions of 1848 and but you’ve got a good point. I’m not sure on how to solve this one since the Austro-Prussian just didn’t do that trick.

I suppose you could come to the victory party with the Swiss (although we still haven’t figured a way to circumvent the draw which has us “obviously” meeting in the semi-finals).

I appreciate the congratulations and of course next month will be the big move (of course). So am I to gather you’re a Joyce aficionado?

By june16_1904 | June 4th, 2008 at 1:14 pm

Man, football bloggers pick up on that date right away. Either liking the beautiful game means you know your James Joyce or we’re just getting better at google. Good catch on the allusion.

I would be all for Austria, but with them being the obvious tournament favorites, I just feel the need to support an underdog.

I’d like to point out that June 28th will be the anniversary of the death of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. How can the Austrian players be expected to play in the final on the 29th, while still in mourning?

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 1:38 pm

I actually just assumed you knew me because not many people throw out a Ulysses seque. It was either that or you’re from Dublin.

True regarding favorites, the entire “92nd ranked team” is a long-term rouse to lull everyone to sleep before we (and our Swiss friends) are triumphant. It’ll make for a great full length film and books as we leap 91 spots. Maybe we should cheer for the Germans in our group, they’re “pretty good”.

Regarding the Archduke situation, your point is brilliant (boffo I’d say). However lets look into this because it may have been the 28th and if thats the case (ahah!) the entire tournament was planned to avoid that date. Maybe there is a conspiracy theorist that can help on this one?

By june16_1904 | June 4th, 2008 at 2:15 pm

Nope. I’m American. I think we can get somewhere with this Archduke/Ulysses thing though…

He was assassinated on the 28th, the day before the final, which really does cast the whole tournament in a different light. I see patterns!

Not to mention, Austria will be playing “pretty good” Germany on the 16th of June, Bloomsday.

Bloom (protaganist of Ulysses, for those wondering) was descended from a Hungarian Jew from Szombathely, Hungary, only a mile or two from the Austrian border. It was, of course, ruled by Austria when the archduke was assassinated.

To top it all off, Joyce wrote Ulysses in Zurich (partially).

Now, if any of you don’t see that all this means Austria are destined to win this year’s Euro, well then you don’t know football.

By j | June 4th, 2008 at 2:50 pm

Well, first off all, you Sir are genius how you have put this entire affair together. The cleverly planned low-ranked team (took decades to orchestrate), slyly awarded a spot as co-host of the tournament only to leap up the rankings the week before (do recall we are the fastest rising team in Europe now) and now the entire hodgepodge of events connected (Ulysses, the Arch Duke, the Habsburg Austrian Empire). Nostradamus (or even that trusty ouija board) couldn’t have predicted it but you Sir did!

I won’t be surprised if they stop betting on the matches once this leaks. You should probably begin planning your book and speaking tour.

By june16_1904 | June 4th, 2008 at 2:59 pm

Thank you. You don’t know how much this recognition means to me after laboring in obscurity all these years.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go watch the US defeat Spain by a scoreline of 4-0 in today’s friendly.

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